Tips For Building Confidence Levels - 2007-Oct-28
Building self confidence can be a very hard task to accomplish, especially if you're feeling pretty down on yourself. But it can also be a very easy goal to achieve if you have a few simple techniques under your belt, that help you control your feelings and emotions, and react to them in a positive way. It's all based on the premise that when you feel good, your self esteem and self confidence get a boost.
When you eat something that tastes absolutely divine, you immediately feel pleasure and joy and want to enjoy continuing eating it. When your nose picks up a really bad smell, you immediately express revulsion and want to get away from the smell as quickly as possible.
In every situation you encounter, your feelings are immediately brought into play and then determine how you react to everything that happens to you. Let's quickly cover the different types and groups of feelings, because it's important to recognise them so you know how to deal with them and manage them in a positive way.
The first group we'll look at are commonly referred to in NLP and painful feelings.
Imagine you're having a bath, you've been lead there relaxing for a while, and the water is getting a little cooler than you'd like, so you expertly twist the hot tap with your toes, but suddenly a rush of scalding hot water shoots out and burns your foot. You yell out in pain and immediately pull your foot away from the water. So we can see that painful feelings make you move away from the source of pain.
One of the strongest painful feelings is anxiety. The problem with anxiety is that it can be very debilitating, and is also pretty non-specific. By "non-specific" I mean that you can feel really anxious and low without really knowing what the exact cause of your anxiety symptoms are.
Feelings of anxiety can be extremely strong and can easily cause you to waken from a deep sleep, and to bring on a panic attack. It can demoralize you, reduce your self esteem and virtually wipe out your self confidence. It can also reduce your ability to make decisions and prevent you from taking any form of positive actions in your life.
The second group of feeling we call pleasure feelings.
Where we strive to move away from negative feelings, we will constantly try to move towards pleasurable and positive feelings. Anything that makes us feel good is something we want to continue to experience is much and as often as possible. Imagine you've been away on business and haven't seen your partner all week. The end of the week has arrived and you're on your way home. The first thing you want to do when you see your partner again is give them a huge hug. It's a feeling we enjoy and crave, so want to experience it as much as we can.
We are all programmed to seek out pleasurable experiences and situations, and to try to have more of them in our lives. This is why romance, holidays and even pleasure parks play such an important part in our lives. Pleasurable emotions and feelings that we can't get enough of include happiness, joy, laughter, love, friendship, fulfilment, winning, being loved and inner peace.
Pleasurable experiences make us feel good, and we feel good on the outside, we feel good on the inside, and our self confidence level and self esteem grow immensely. The trick is to control your emotions so that you always feel positive about the things that happen to you in every day life. When you're in complete control over how you react and how you feel, your emotions will always be positive, and your self confidence and self esteem will soar.
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